Sassy Girl: How to Nosedive, And How to Spin Your Way Out Of It

Posted on May 5, 2009
Filed Under MTV College Life | By Benjamin Geary

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When Lindsay popped onto the television screen in episode three of College Life, my friend Sam, who’s been a bit down lately, declared an immediate and only semi-sarcastic crush on her. He was quickly repelled. Lindsay went from smart, studious, a little goofy and real cute, to studious, real cute and emotionally reminiscent of a 14-year-old. For example, when she first addressed the camera as “camera,” I thought it was clever—a subtly ironic way to explain that this is more a diary for her than anything else. By last night, however, it seemed like lighthouse: “Warning. Warning. Rocks Ahead.” During last night’s episode of College Life, Lindsay’s zero-to-sixty with a guy named Max (a “sassy man”) spawned MTV’s own Remote Control blog entry on five signs it wasn’t meant to be between Max and our girl. I would agree that Max probably wasn’t over his ex-girlfriend. But if you want him to be over his ex-girlfriend you’re going to have a multiple-year wait. The better option is to be the better option.

So, my five reasons why Lindsay is hardly blameless for the split:

1. She made fun of his ex-girlfriend. She made fun of her name.

2. Oh, to be “Facebook official.” I never know how much I care about someone—or anything these days—until I’ve defined our relationship on Facebook. I keep wondering if I love my mother because she’s not on Facebook (…yet, thank god).

3. She gets “bad feelings” about him. That’s like making a list of the best Japanese horror movies you know while trying to fall asleep in a tent. It isn’t going to help you fall asleep.

4. Lindsay decided Max would just love it (and her) if she filmed them having a serious conversation while he was in the shower. Max responded appropriately I think by turning the tables. Something tells me his ex would have switched off the camera and gotten in the shower.

5. As Andrea’s friend Erica so eloquently put it, “you can’t have your cake and eat it too…on this case.” When you want to be disappointed, Lindsay, feel free to engineer it. Feel free to call him every five seconds. Pushing him just so he’ll come back like a knight, especially when he’s hardly even there (and then going all to pieces over it) seems a terrible way to get yourself hurt.

Visit Unigo for a roundup of our exclusive coverage MTV College Life’s fourth episode.

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